How To: Keep your head up and don’t let favors and brown-nosing outweigh your merits

Ever have the luxury of being told on? You know, like that little snotty kid in second grade who would tell the teacher if you did something or if you didn’t do something?

“Teacher! Teacher! Christina said, ‘crap!'” and you sit there and go, “Um, wait, so? It’s not a swear word.” And the next thing you know, the kid is bringing the teacher an apple, a cupcake and a freakin’ new sweater saying, “Oh! Teacher! You’re the best teacher I’ve ever had!”

You think, well, of course they’re going to appease that little shit by giving in and making sure everything she says or points out is seen or heard. “Now, Christina. What did we say about using words like that?” It doesn’t matter that you have an A in all of your subjects and have never swore in your life, you’re still being reprimanded my this stupid snot! “But…! But…!”

“I don’t want to hear another word…” and you hang your head in shame. You didn’t get in trouble, but you might as well have for that humiliation.

Well, that annoying, snot-nosed, brown-noser never goes away. Just like high school drama never ceases to result in your adult life, no matter how much you attempt to avoid it. It’s kind of like the Swine Flu: if it wants you, it will find you and get you. But what can you do to keep all that crap  from getting to your head?

See, it’s at times like those where you’re caught up in the moment and you don’t know how to respond, let alone feel hurt because you’ve never had to suck up to anyone in your entire life to do a good job or to have anyone like and notice you. You’re not there to do that ass-kissing and your merit-based system has always worked in your head…. and sometimes real life.

At least, in a perfect world, that’s how it should be, right?

Then you have that slut that slept with your boss for a raise, the other ass-kisser that tells the higher-ups they look great in everything they wear and stares down at the other people in the room, although when they were just starting he/she was your best friend at the office (but now since you can’t elevate their status, you’re no good to them); and finally that person that’s so damn good at their job, they might as well have an IQ as bad as your credit score. But fear not, there is always the fact that you have a life, you don’t have to kiss ass and you’re good at what you do to keep your head up.

  • Don’t let it get to you. How? Well, just think, at least I know I can get somewhere on my own, without having to be a snot. You’re not the one having to keep up that saintly image of being perfect, chipper, cutsie or pretend that you love your boss for everything they do (and aren’t afraid to announce it to the world on any social network).
  • Listen to music at work if you can. They make headphones for a reason. If you can listen to music to drown out the sounds, do it. It will also relax the work flow.
  • Ignore it. Seriously. When s/he comes to talk to you, ask you for a favor, or whatever else s/he can possibly want, do it and get it over with. Stay professional, but don’t give in to the bullshit you know s/he’s either trying to feed you or trying to get you to be a part of. (Remember, that same little second grade girl would make you say mean things about someone and then go and tell them, pretending that they were being a spy for them. This one does the same thing. Look out!)
  • Focus on your work, your research or whatever projects you have going on. Stop eavesdropping. That’s something s/he does, not you.
  • Present your work with the utmost honor. If you have to present something, make it thorough and precise. The more work you do and do it well, the more the snot will be in your past and way behind you.
  • Don’t say it, show it. S/He may tell everyone how awesomely great s/he is, but the less you say and the more you do will over compensate for everything s/he says and the things s/he lacks on.
  • Don’t bitch with names. Ok, everyone knows that you have to get things off your chest, just don’t use any names because you never know who you’re talking to. I know you’re not going to keep your mouth shut and if it helps relieve any kind of stress that you’re under, it’s better to talk it out.
  • Talk to your boss about your position, seating area or the fact that some things make you uncomfortable. If it’s getting that out of hand, say something. Period.

Well, there you have it, kids. Stay out of the blame game and the high school drama. It’s not good for you or your soul. Remember, the only person you can control is yourself. So have at it. Control yourself and always try to be the best you possible.

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